Who woulda thunk it?
Who woulda thunk that I would have SOOOOOoooooo many lurkers and regulars? Delurking day was a huge success. I have a reader in Kenya? WOW. Thanks so much to everyone for delurking. Please come by and comment often...even if it is just to say hi. I am so honored to have you all here.
I am currently blogging from the nation's capital. Yup, I am in Chocolate City today and tomorrow on business. Mr. 1969 will be holding down the fort at home with the Tali's.
I have a few friends that are Stay at home moms and they are always commenting on how "great" my husband is with the kids. "He watches them while you are away on business? My husband would never go for that."
Uh...yeah. They ARE his kids too. Why wouldn't he watch them? That's his job, D-A-D- D-Y. Just like, I am here to take care of them if he ever can't. It's called parenting. The men don't get a medal for doing stuff they are supposed to do. You are not "babysitting" your own kids. LOL
I guess, these ladies have husband's that don't help out with the children. They feel that they are working and the moms are at home so the kids are mom's job. Well, we don't have any family near us. No dropping the kids off to grandma. So if I am away, Daddy takes over. If he has something to do, I turn into Superwoman. I can honestly say that we share the responsibilities of parenting. I am blessed because I know this is not the case in a lot of households.
How do things work in your house? Did your mom run the house and dad just played with you every once in a while? Let's talk about it.
I am currently blogging from the nation's capital. Yup, I am in Chocolate City today and tomorrow on business. Mr. 1969 will be holding down the fort at home with the Tali's.
I have a few friends that are Stay at home moms and they are always commenting on how "great" my husband is with the kids. "He watches them while you are away on business? My husband would never go for that."
Uh...yeah. They ARE his kids too. Why wouldn't he watch them? That's his job, D-A-D- D-Y. Just like, I am here to take care of them if he ever can't. It's called parenting. The men don't get a medal for doing stuff they are supposed to do. You are not "babysitting" your own kids. LOL
I guess, these ladies have husband's that don't help out with the children. They feel that they are working and the moms are at home so the kids are mom's job. Well, we don't have any family near us. No dropping the kids off to grandma. So if I am away, Daddy takes over. If he has something to do, I turn into Superwoman. I can honestly say that we share the responsibilities of parenting. I am blessed because I know this is not the case in a lot of households.
How do things work in your house? Did your mom run the house and dad just played with you every once in a while? Let's talk about it.
posted by 1969 at
9:55 AM
24 Comments:
my dad was pretty active in my life until he passed.. then my uncle took his place as best as he could before he passed..
but i was a youngin when all that happened and after that all I saw was my mom LOL but I remember them sharing it when I was a lil shorty..
Both of my parents worked and whoever was available did what needed to be done. (the way it should be)
My first husband expected the domestic goddess crap - one of the reasons he's an ex - (not enough time to go into all the reasons)
Well my dad "played" house then rolled out but that's besides the point. :)
nowadays me and the wife split the duties, except doing hair. that's all her. :)
I feel you 1969, I have a ton of female friends with BDs who don't do NOTHING with the kids! Its like pulling teeth to get them to stay at home with the kids if they're sick. My former boss's husband came right out and told her its a WOMAN'S job to stay home with sick kids {{shaking my head}}...and she made more money than him!
Single parent home
Before my parents divorced I can't really remember too much. I think there was a nanny (as you know in the WI, once you have two incomes, you can afford a nanny) hence the degree to which my Mom was overwhelmed when we moved here, her marriage ended and she suddenly had a hell of a lot more parenting to do.
Hi 1969 and how are you?
Well my father did not play a role in my life. However, my grandmother
was there for me and she would care for me.... when my mom was at work or just needed a break. Almost forgot, my aunt would help out as much as she could...
Enjoy your day...........
oops I realized I didn't say how it was in my house now..
I'm a single parent so I pretty much hold it down with the help of a great support system in my mom and friends!!!
LOl @ fresh.. GLAD you steppin away from lil homies hair!!!! for real.. I bet not eva see her up on Team A hallway with a jacked up do!
my name is gee gee and I'm not a lurker!!!...both my parents worked full time jobs in the Chocolate City..{shouts out to DA UREA) so I stayed with grandma a lot..then they divorce and mama gee held it down while working downtown 9 to 5...I didn't appreciate all she did for me as a single parent til I turned 30..what a shame! I'm making up for it now bigtime! my dad lived 5 minutes away but still she did everything!
my daddy is the best daddy ever. yep I said it. He is the type to say washing dishes is a woman's job while wearing an apron and scrubbing a pot in between servin the dinner he cooked to my mommy and her friends.
i can honeslty say that i want to have a parenting partnership (one day when i get married and have kids) with my husband, their DADDY, i didn't have that, mom was it all...
my dad provided for us, but we didn't really get close and bond until i went to college, it was alway my mother taking me here and there and attending events...
so i dig the way you all do it, the way I think it should be done
My mom was a single parent, so she played both roles. As for my house, well, I'm no martyr mom. My husband goes out with some or all of the kiddos (sounds like I have a gang, lol) on a regular basis. And I go out alone at least twice a week. In fact, I have to...it's the only way I maintain my "sanity", hehe.
Um...daddy wasn't there. I would use my grandfather, but by the time we came along I think all he wanted was quiet..and fried lake trout. His top two phrases were: "Pearl stop yelling" and "Would ya'll do what she wants so she can stop yelling".
Hey Mrs. 1969! I missed de~lurking, but I'd like to think I'm somewhat of a reg, even though I don't always comment! :)
My mom was single mom, dad passed through once a year IF that. He only became a fixture in my life after hurricane Katrina. Simply b/c we stayed w/ him for a month. Lol So what my momma said went!
Well... my Mom was a single mother from the time I can remember (they were divorced when I was 3 and I literally have NO MEMORY of EVER living with my father)...so,it was just me and HER.....she RAN ish! LOL
But as for the responsibilities of raising this lil boy I have....MANNNNN PUH-LEASE! you said it best.... You don't GET no medals for raising someone who is as MUCH YOURS as mine! NIG-A-RO PLEASE! I ,too, have friends whose husbands leave them with the children with no problem and hardly ever take them places with them.
My theory: I can be divorced and do THAT! I sinply can't see it! I am a person, an individual ,who needs HER OWN TIME too!!! There is flat-out no way that I could be married to someone who wouldn't step up because it is simply inconsiderate. I will tolerate other minor things, but you trying to "do you" while I shoulder all of the responsibility of raising one or two or MORE children 90-100% of the time???
In the words of Oprah in The Color Purple "I said.....HELLLLLL NAW"
My childhood was very unorganized. My parents were never married and my mother worked two jobs trying to raise me. Until I was twelve, I stayed with my aunts. At twelve, I ran home from school one day and told my mother I didn't want to stay with my aunt anymore (nothing bad or anything just wanted to sleep in my own bed instead of on someone elses couch), if social services knew my mother let me stay home alone from 12-17 my life might be different but the experience helped me become the man I am now.
*sigh* I pray parenting duties will be a dual responsibility when 'it' happens.
Growing up. Dad there, but not there. I mean, he made sure we ate and were clean when Mom wasn't there, but it kind of felt like being with the babysitter.
My mom ran the show. The only time she deferred to him was when we asked for something, and she didn't want to be the bad guy or didn't feel like fussing. Then it was 'Go ask your father'.
Well, I was raised in a home with both parents. They both did what they were supposed to do. My mom became sick when I was 12 and died when I was 16 and my dad took care of everything with help from other family members. He never missed a beat and did his best to make sure I had a wonderful childhood.
Now, I'm married with two kids. I'm a stay at home mom but my husband is still very much a part of everything. He takes the kids out so I can have quiet time. Or, he'll stay with them when I go out. He does NOT babysit; he parents them just like I do. The only thing he refuses to do is comb my daughter's hair (just like A.F.F.) and that's cool with me. Several of our friends have also remarked about how he's so good with the kids. My comment is always "yes he is because he loves and takes care of his family."
Big shout out to all the men who understand the importance of fatherhood.
My dad shares cooking and cleaning with my mom. My dad picked me up from school. He irons his own clothes, etc. My mom made the grocery list and my dad went to the store with it. Folks sometimes would say, "Oh, your mom's runnin' that white man!" or, "Your mom wears the pants!" but really my parents just have a real understanding about the equality of men and women. That's what I looked for in a man, because no, I'm not a maid and if you're watching the kids, you're not doing me a favor.
I was raised by my grandmother. And she was fortunate enough to be able to run the house and have time to play with me! LOL
My mother took care of us and my father paid the bills. ROFL!
When my son was born until he was 6, the husband was the primary parent. I shopped and cooked but he did pick up and drop off at day care. He fed him and gave baths. After 6 he assumed the child was ready to do alot of that himself, lol. I've always been the homework, school related stuff parent. But there are somethings that I consider "Father duties" especially with sons.
i know that's right!! that's his job too! love that he participates. my dad was out of town a LOT for work when i was younger. but he got 6 weeks of vacay, mostly in the summer. so he was our toy when we were younger. we'd hang out with him and my mom would go out of town. he would cook and once bought us mcd's 3xs in one day which was in essence heaven for a 9-year-old. good times, good times.
and when they got divorced, we'd usually spend weekends with him when he was in town.
My father was in and out of jail most of my childhood, but I had the world's greatest stepfather--I still rely on him for advice.
I've often heard women complain about how inactive their men are in their lives and the lives of their kids. I wonder how a person can't see that trait before getting in too deep. My hubby and I have yet to have kids, but women have commented on how loving he is towards me. He's mu husband--shouldn't he be?
I try not to judge others, but dang--I just can't settle for less.
My dad took care of me a lot when I was a kid. When my parents got divorced I actually thought I was going with him for a minute. Heh. I am with you. Children need their dads. It is important they see how to become a man so it is excellent your husband actively parents.
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